52 Things from the 90’s That No One Misses

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“Hidden tracks” after ten minutes of silence at the end of albums

Dial-up Internet, and the sound it made

Vice President Dan Quayle

When MTV only played music videos

Jay Leno being taken seriously

Palm Pilots

Hotmail

BK Knights

NBA Jam

Having your little sister die from a Ring Pop mishap

Chicken Soup for the Soul (Book Club)

Alicia Silverstone movies that aren’t Clueless

“The very best thing of all” (the counter on this Skip-It ball)

People being obsessed with Andrew Lloyd Webber

The Microsoft Office paper clip

Pogs

Tracy Chapman

The mom on 7th Heaven

Well-meaning, poorly-informed sentiments about Tibet and the Balkans

Bucket hats

Nancy Drew on Campus books

Shortalls

Puff paint

Holding Willy captive

The Macarana

Thinking Jakob Dylan was going to be the voice of a generation

Suddenly Susan being more popular than The Naked Truth

Getting Gak in your hair

The smell of old Gak on your hands

Now-and-Then-inspired seances

Land Before Time sequels

Lipliner

Veggie Tales

Brendan Fraser, leading man

Murphy, the dog from Mad About You

Bananas in Pajamas

Janet Reno blue

Defending Milli Vanilli

Gateway Computers

Being huddled over a crib at a goddamn kite store (Air Traffic) every Saturday morning looking for a specific Beanie Baby

People forgetting about O.J.’s superb acting career

Putting one strand of beads in your hair at camp

Feeling like you were going to hell for removing your W.W.J.D. bracelet when you went swimming

Jelly shoes comeback

Water shoes

Doodle bears

Having to play with yo-yos, not iPads

Inflatable furniture

Crazy Bones

Being haunted by images of Marshall Applewhite

The monster of a Cabbage Patch Kid doll that ate plastic food mechanically and had a backpack where the food went and then you’d take the food out of the backpack and put it right back in her mouth and you’d do that over and over until your hair would get stuck too, honestly a NIGHTMARE

Jay BollerJay GablerSarah HarperBecky LangMarcus MichalikChrissy StocktonChristopher Vondracek, and Emily Weiss