In Defence of Pyjamas

As a pyjama wearer I feel that there is an important issue that needs to be addressed. (Please note that “pyjama” in this context includes and is not exclusive to: actual pyjama sets, old t-shirts, your boyfriend’s boxers, lounge pants, trackies, and that hoodie that’s been in your wardrobe since 1996.) That issue, as fellow pyjama wearers are probably aware, is that people are looked down upon when they are dressed in pyjamas.

Now I am one of those folks who, after the 9-5, like to release ourselves of our heels and restrictive work attire and snuggle into a pair of comfortable baggies and a crummy t-shirt. This is otherwise known to some as the no-you-aren’t-getting-laid-tonight outfit. I am also not one of those people who will waste a whole face of make-up and my favourite pair of jeans on a day when only the postman is going to see me.

I have noticed of late a certain condescending tone that creeps upon peoples tongues when one is dressed in such a way. My father, for example, is far less likely to think that I have had a productive day if I am wearing pyjamas. My mother commented last week that I live in a “strange household where people still wear their dressing gowns in the middle of the day.” Boyfriends and girlfriends seem to think that anything sexual is out of the question just because one isn’t slinking around in silken lingerie. The last two times I got dumped, I was wearing my pyjamas.

This isn’t some emotionally-damaged sitting-on-a-chair-in-a-therapist’s-office rant about how I associate pyjamas with all the bad things that happen in life. No. This is a stand. Because I will have you know, People of the General Public, that just because I am wearing a pair of fluffy slippers does not mean that I am not sporting pretty underwear. Neither does the pattern on my socks affect my thinking. I will not be talked to as a lower IQed citizen simply for my preference for snuggly hoodies and a pair of pyjama slacks. The fact that I didn’t spend an age getting ready this morning may mean that I had hours more work time than you did, and I will have you know that a packet of crisps just tastes better when it’s crumbing up the front of your Care Bears t-shirt.

This is for you. This is for me. This is for every pyjama-sporting-person reading this post, and the socks that are warming your feet. We will stand tall, we will stand strong, and your fluffy slippers will not stand alone.

Thank you, and good night.

Felicity Cluff, United Kingdom

From The Tangential archives: September 2011